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Tag Archives: Marriage

My Regret of 2013

Looking back over the past year there are a few things I wish I did differently. Quite a few. But I also realize that this is my journey and “the way things were” are the way things were. But I do have one thing that stands out above the rest.

My regret of 2013

regret 2013

We forgot to date.

Oh, there are plenty of reasons:

  • The busyness of life
  • Finances
  • Too tired
  • No idea of where to go or what to do
  • Lack of motivation
  • Did I mention finances?

Call them what they are – excuses. Lame ones too. Really, time just slipped away. We didn’t make it a priority. Notice, babysitter isn’t on the list. Our kids are past the age of needing a sitter. We know we have the freedom to go out at any time, so no planning is needed. And none was taken.

Not this year. 2014 is the year of dates!  This problem has a really simple fix. Just Date! 

Suggestions for dates are being accepted in the comment section.

What is your regret of 2013? How can you change that for 2014?

There’s one factor I left off the list. It gets it’s own blog post. Any guesses?

Afraid – Five Minute Friday

I am participating in a blog link-up, called Five Minute Friday over at Lisa-Jo’s site Lisa-Jo Baker – tales from a gypsy mama. There are a couple of rules, but basically you just write (no edits! *gulp*) about a specific topic for five full minutes and link back to her.

Afraid

GO

My husband just gave me a kiss goodbye, grabbed his breifcase and overnight bag and walked out the door. My weekend of alone-parenting begins. Girl time. I try to console myself with the fun and productive weekend I have planned, but my mind wanders to a place I don’t want it to go. A place of fear.

I think about the time he went out of town and was involved in a horrific four wheeler accident that could’ve ended with a broken neck, but thankfully only ended with a severely broken leg. (only????) The memories of that nightmarish time keeps my mind locked in a place of fear.

My mind continues to wander to another time when I went out of town with the kids… we almost lost my husband completely that time. Meningitis overtook his body and mind and he passed out. He was completely delirious and out of his mind. I flew home to find him in the hospital and completely unaware of who I was. For three days his mind was locked away as he fought through the sickness. It was beyond a nightmare.

So… sometimes I get a bit nervous when either one of us go out of town. I am afraid.

I can choose to live in that fear, hardly sleeping and filling my days with plenty of activities to keep the fear away…

OR

I can choose to pray. Deny the fear and hold onto to God’s peace. THEN I won’t be afraid.

When I am afraid I will trust in You. Psalms 56:3

STOP

Now it’s your turn… What makes you afraid?

Check what others are writing about at tales from a gypsy mama.

Coffee, Tea, and Mentoring

Heads bowed in prayer and hearts united in honesty as two women embrace the teaching in the second book of Titus. Steam rises from their tea and coffee as their prayers reach the heavens. A Bible is open before them revealing these words:

Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure,workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.

Life is often messy. Being a wife and mother is hard. Being a godly wife and mother is such a difficult task, we are not called to do it alone. 

Mentor. A phrase often thrown around – businesses provide programs for new employees, schools pair older students with younger ones to provide opportunities to learn leadership and relational skills, churches even have programs of mentorship. The concept is not a new one. It originated in Bible days with this passage.

Do you have a mentor? Does it follow the principles of Titus Two?

The importance of mentorship is found in Titus 2: 11-15.

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope—the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good. These, then, are the things you should teach. Encourage and rebuke with all authority. Do not let anyone despise you.

It is not easy to follow the path and principles in Titus Two. Our society is filled with words that are sweet and dishonest in order to not offend as well as words that are quick to judge which often offend. The key is to live the principles, hope in Christ, and walk with others who will teach, encourage, and rebuke.

As the prayer ends and the coffee is cold, the women’s hearts are warm. Words difficult to hear were spoken. Words difficult to speak were received with hope.

Building bridges with mentors requires living and teaching in honesty – ready to encourage and rebuke.

16 Years of Marriage – Cruising Through Life Together!

Our marriage is 16 years old. To honor that milestone, I have a few auto-observations.

1. Stay in the car. Before we married, Kevin and I made the commitment to never use the word Divorce. It is not an option.

2. Who’s in the drivers seat? We strive to let God be the one in the driver’s seat, but it’s not always how it works out. He’s the safest driver. Next up: Kevin. I know that when I get in the drivers seat and try to control things – we are headed for a wreck FOR SURE!

3. He opens the door for me. Chivarly. I love it when he goes out of his way for me!

4. Follow a map! The map we follow is the Bible. Sometimes we have gotten off course, but when we get back on track, our marriage thrives.

5. Before you buy the car, read the owner’s manual. Before you get married, study who you are going to marry. Many churches and pastors require counselling before you get married.

6. Sometimes you have to take the car to a mechanic. If you have struggles in your marriage, seek help with counseling.

7. Enjoy the ride! Don’t keep waiting for the next stop, the next big event, the next raise, the next child… you might miss the blessings of today.

8. Keep your eyes on the road – Not in the rearview mirror. If you focus on what is in the past, you will miss what is yet to come!

9. Detours are inevitable. Be flexible and willing to change your route.

10. Sitting idle is a waste of gas. In marriage, idols (and addictions) are a waste of time and energy.

11. Fix a flat. Don’t let your marriage get flat. Keep things fun and fresh.

12. Routine maintenance.  Just like you change the oil and keep up with things under the hood of you car running smoothly, taking care of yourself and keeping healthy will help your marriage stay healthy and running smoothly too!

13. Drive safely and obey rules of the road. In marriage, there are rules that need to be followed too. Don’t be checkin’ under any other car’s hoods!

14. Keys – A key part of marriage is respect.

15. Take road trips! Spend time together – without kids. Regular dates and weekends away are very important.

16. It’s not about arriving at the destination, it’s all about the journey.

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