Without thinking I picked up the cracker my kids were discussing with their aunt and popped it into my mouth. I thought, it’s only cheese. I know just what happens with cheese and I can handle it! Just one. Just one dime-sized bite. It wasn’t until I was swallowing that I realized the overpowering taste was garlic. GARLIC! My foe. One of my bigger allergies.
For awhile, nothing happened. Then a headache appeared right in the middle of my forehead. It wasn’t too bad and I thought, maybe I’ll be OK this time! Thirty minutes later the headache was in full force. With the headache came the mood swing. By the time we were almost home, I was over-reacting to all situations with my kids. The kids knew I ate something and was right in the middle of a reaction. They knew the drill. They knew to stay away from mom and just give her space. A few hours later I was better, except for the headache that lasted for three days, despite any meds.
What won’t go away is the fear. If a bite the size of a dime can set off that much of a reaction, what would an entire meal laced with my
poison allergies do to me? Why did I react so much? I normally don’t react to this degree. What else in my system is off? I’ve been working with my doctor to regulate my thyroid. It’s off. Again. When it’s off, my system is overloaded. When my system is overloaded… you got it! I react more to my allergies. I know all of that, but it still doesn’t take away my fear.
A few plans needed to be set in place.
- First, we looked at our calendar. Any plans that would place me in danger with food were re-evaluated.
- Can I control the food?
- Can I request special items?
- Can I bring my own food?
- Some events were cancelled. One in particular was a difficult decision.
- Some events will just take extra planning – calls to local restaurants to find one to work with me or extra time around a kitchen so I can cook safe meals.
- Plans for date nights – find at least one place that will work with my food allergies.
- Plans for lunch out with friends -Salads are easy, but that means I need to bring my own dressing.
- Plans for coffee at coffee shops – Once again, I can take my own add-ins – I just have to remember to!
Instead of planning, this week I pouted. Until my pastor read this verse:
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1: 6 – 9
Now I’m finding joy.
I can make the best of this.
One bite at a time.